While some parents believe that the method can be beneficial to help young children learn to soothe themselves to sleep, other parents are against it. Tovah Klein, who serves as the director of the Barnard College Center for Toddler Development and is an associate professor in the college's Psychology Department, weighed in on the childhood controversy.
Klein said that one of the main issues with the "cry-it-out" method is that parents are always seeking a cut and dry answer. She pointed out that the issue isn't quite so black and white. The age of the infant is an important factor when deciding whether or not to let the baby cry for a certain period of time.
Ideally, we help them learn to go to sleep not by putting them into a deep sleep, but rather lay them down at that point where they are dozing off, swaddled, and on their way to sleep," she said, in reference to newborns.
After the newborn period, the effectiveness of the "cry-it-out" method varies by child and parent. It's their way of communicating with us. But, you have to know your infant," she said. They may fuss for a few minutes and some fuss for longer, but then they finally put themselves to sleep. And they are going to be fine. Some parents can't handle the crying," said Klein. Does a baby need to scream for hours on end?
Klein, who is the author of How Toddlers Thrive , points out that a little crying is fine for young infants in the three to six month age range. Although, there are certain times when a parent needs to step in. They go up and get upset, but can they come back down. As much as the world would like to make it about 'do you let them cry or don't you,' it's kind of a between answer. Will it damage her emotionally? Will it ruin our relationship?
The answer to all of those questions, according to a new study published in the journal Pediatrics , is no. Researchers from Australia worked with families who said that their babies ages months had a sleep problem. They divided the families into three groups.
They also asked the mothers about their levels of stress. Twelve months later, they looked for any emotional or behavioral problems in the babies, and they also did testing to see how attached the babies were to their mothers. The babies in the graduated extinction group and the bedtime fading group both fell asleep faster and had less stress than the control group — and not only that, their mothers were less stressed than the control group mothers.
Of the three groups, the extinction group babies were less likely to wake up again during the night. And when it came to emotional or behavioral problems, or attachment, all three groups were the same. Which makes everyone happier. In another study published about four years ago, researchers looked even further out than a year.
There was no difference between the two groups. Whether parents let babies cry or got up all night to hold them, the kids turned out the same. It just means that you slowly but surely help your baby learn to soothe himself when he wakes up at night, instead of always relying on you to do it.
If your baby is waking up crying at night, talk to your doctor. There are lots of reasons babies cry at night. As a service to our readers, Harvard Health Publishing provides access to our library of archived content. Please note the date of last review or update on all articles. Your baby will probably be fine, Claire McCarthy MD, but the babies of the moms and dads commenting here are going to be much better. There is a reason that intuitively mothers perhaps less-so fathers are pulled by the cries of their young.
They are responding to a call. This is their only form of communication. Attachment is not an issue just for babies…The fallout from feeling emotionally insecure, may not surface until much later in life, teens and beyond. The more you reject a baby or anyone who us dependent on you , the more they will cling to you.
It is certainly no indication of mental health. The relationship you sow with your newborn and baby, the way you let them know you care if they cry, comes to fruition much later, especially in the teen years.
This study proves nothing and will cause great harm. There is no scientific long term study that can show that letting babies cry themselves to sleep is not harmful. Eventually, babies will learn to sleep through the night, but when this happens is different for every baby. While at times it may feel like your child is never going to sleep through the night, take heart! Good sleep behaviors will come, with time and patience, and a consistent, age-appropriate bedtime routine.
Learn more about sleep training tips here. Is "cry it out" harmful or helpful?
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